Yep — just a month and a half to decide what you’re getting me for my birthday. I know it’s difficult — I mean, what do you get the asshole that has just about everything? How about one of these:

The Bugatti Veyron

Zero to 60 MPH in (yawn) 2.46 seconds — Zero to 200 in under 30 seconds. Not to shabby for a 4 wheel drive with a mere 1000 horsepower. Pretty damn affordable with a base price of about $1,623,067.10 USD.

I’m not too picky if you’re wondering what color I’d like best.

Yeah, so - Since I run a bar, I see drunk and/or random hookups all the time. If I didn’t see at least one per night, I might start thinking something was seriously wrong in the fabric of the universe.

I’m not a one-night-stand kinda guy, in general… It’s just not the way I like to work things. The opportunities are generally there, but I’m typically lookin for love rather than a one-night-stand… I am not, however, immune to lure of a lovely woman — particularly when she’s as smart and easy going as she is gorgeous.

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I really can’t get enough fiction mag cover art …

I’m thinking about having a tattoo done based on this one.

I can’t believe that this one is from the mid-30’s … I’m sure, back then, it was considered absolutely raunchy — but for some reason I find it elegant… And sexy.

Holy shit was that fast …

3 polaks, 2 crow bars and a skill saw… Nothing but the decaying slab left. That’ll have to wait ’til Thursday.

I gotta say — these guys worked smart. Took about a dozen well placed cuts of the saw and the roof of the was gone. The walls came down even quicker. If they’d brought a bigger truck, the whole job would have been done in 2 hours.

Sadly, I lost an old storage box during the demo — I don’t think there was anything of major importance in it, but it makes me sad to think some part of my history that wasn’t intended for the dumpster is somewhere in a landfill right now. Ah, well — guess it’s been collecting dust and rat shit for the past 5 years — couldn’t have been that important to me, eh?

On a cool note, I did re-discover my HUGE print of Roy Lichtenstein’s drowning girl. Thank god (yes, with a lowercase g) I had the movers pack it up really well during my last move. Not bit of rat piss on it.

Kinda funny, but I guess this print has always reminded me of Capital “C” — seems a bit more poignant now than ever before.

No, it’s not another ‘top-ten things to do to give you a (false) sense of accomplishment and draw thousands of (useless) hits to your site” type article . All of those are mostly bullshit anyway.

Sure — you could try link-building, link-baiting, doing that “real content” thing or hundreds of other things to build your site popularity. But why?

Why not just find a really disgusting photo of Courtney Love being ever-so-unsexy, post it to your site with some amazingly interesting copy, and prepare to upgrade your server.

It really does seem that all you have to do to get thousands of fresh new visitors to your site every day is to post this image on your site.

It’s become so popular here that it’s by far the #1 most viewed article on my site — logging nearly 10,000 hits a day.

So the next time you’re sitting around and thinking to yourself, “I really wish I knew how to increase my unique daily visitor stats”, think: sick picture of heroin addicted bitch-from-hell flopping her tits around on stage.