In general, I guess I just want things to flow evenly in both directions.

A little give, a little take.  Seems fair right?

What is this un-Thanksgiving thing?  Well, it’s all the food, none of the family bullshit.  We get together, eat a lot and drink a bit — but thats about where the similarities to a regular Thanksgiving end.  The conversation around the table tends to fall into categories that wouldn’t normally be discussed around family.  Porn, farts, music and “who’s fucking who” (don’t ask).  The beverage of choice is beer, served in the can or bottle it was purchased in, and the empties turn into the centerpiece as the night goes on.

As an added bonus:  This year we got snow — about 6 inches of it.  Perfect!

On that note, I’m off to prepare for this evenings festivities — Karaoke Poker Night.   So much CDG downloading to do!

As someone with an Inspirational Pattern, AB, you may often display a dazzling ability to persuade others. The tools you use to achieve this goal can vary. Often, you can be quite charming and convince people to do what you want by strength of pure likability. At other times, however, you may employ obvious intimidation to get your point across. Usually, the most important factor for you is control, which you tend to seek over your environment or your audience.

You are likely to be clear in your own mind about the results you want. However, you might not always articulate these ambitions. You probably prefer to reach your goals thorough cooperation and persuasion, rather than by exercising domination.

As a part of your tendency to persuade people, you may downplay your own need for affection. This method of maintaining some distance may be part of your conscious attempt to modify the thoughts and actions of others.

I’m sure you’re all like, ‘Dude, who cares? Shuddup’ …

Yesterday, a buddy of mine calls up and asks that I come sub on his pool team. After making 100% sure that I had the all clear (a certain someone wasn’t gonna be there) I decided I’d go out and shoot, when suddenly I’m stopped dead in my tracks. I couldn’t find the keys to my motorcycle.

See, as those of you that read regularly know, I don’t believe in “God” … I’m an atheist. I do, however, believe that there is a fabric to life and most things that happen are somehow interconnected. Go read some Orson Scott Card if you want a more detailed understanding of what I mean.

So, anyway — I searched for hours. Looked in the freezer, under the bed, hell — I even opened the tray of my DVD player to see if maybe the keys were there. No luck.

This morning, I get up, head out to the one place I knew they had to be and there they are. Mind you, I’ve looked in this exact location 3 times with no luck.

Deep down inside I had a bad feeling about going out last night — so either my subconscious mind or the fabric of the universe decided that I should stay in. Now I’m left with this odd tinge of curiosity… What did I avoid last night?

I’m helpin the folks out — bartending at the resort.  We’re having a “reunion show” for a band that used to play here back when I was 15 years old…

Little did I know that 350 people would show up…

The first 3 hours … Well, I couldn’t tell ya much about them.  I was too busy filling 15-drink orders from 3 girls while I was trying to pay attention to the 20-30 people ordering drinks at the bar.  Fuckin’ bedlam — I seriously didn’t even realize the band was playing ’til they were half way through their second set.

Once I got into the rythm of things, I realized there was an insane world of activity going on around me … Even managed to jump over the bar and get between a couple of guys gettin’ ready to throw down, before it actually happened… But there really was a solid couple of hours where I became a drink making machine — Nothing but pour, pour, pour …

8 hours and, nearly $4000 in drink sales later, I’m sittin’ here chatting with Capital “R” trying to get a grasp on what had just happened…  By my figures, I opened over 500 beers and mixed just as many drinks …  All the while, not drinking a single ounce of alcohol … Well, ’til It was 30 minutes to closing.  Then I finally let myself crack open my first beer — for me.

Ah, fuckit — so much more to talk about right not… but the dogs are barkin’ … it’s 3 hours past closing time and I am SPENT!  Maybe I’ll post a more accurate rundown in the morning (afternoon) …

G’Night all!

P.S. — If you ain’t the staff and if you ain’t fuckin’ the staff — go the fuck home.

Once upon a time, when things were real shitty and I was feelin’ down, I’d hop in the Talon, roll down all the windows, open up the sunroof and drive…  I’d drive for hours, getting lost, not caring …

Now the Talon has been replaced by a friends Shadow 1100 — no need to roll down the windows; there are none.  Nothing but the sound of the wind and the adrenaline rush …

Things have gone all upside down and backwards over the past couple weeks.  I haven’t posted much because of it.  Seems that all things bad have a theme this time:  Alcohol.

Frankly, I’m ashamed to admit that my family is in the booze peddling business…  I guess in theory I don’t have anything against alcohol.  It’s the alcohol abuse I’ve got a problem with.  I’m sick of watching people fuck up their lives … It’s sad.

On a good note — I just had the worlds best Singapore Noodles.  Singapore Noodles make me smile.

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GMail Paper

You can make us print one, one thousand, or one hundred thousand of your emails. It’s whatever seems reasonable to you.

I’m also open to one of those city jobs, you know, where you’re on the payroll but you don’t actually do anything.

Actually, just about anything that pays the bills and doesn’t require much effort on my part would be fine.

So, yeah — If you know of anything, please do contact me.

Associated Press

CALVERT, Md. – Toby, a 2-year-old golden retriever, saw his owner choking on a piece of fruit and began jumping up and down on the woman’s chest. The dog’s owner believes the dog was trying to perform the Heimlich maneuver and saved her life.

Debbie Parkhurst, 45, of Calvert told the Cecil Whig she was eating an apple at her home Friday when a piece lodged in her throat. She attempted to perform the Heimlich maneuver on herself but it didn’t work. After she began beating on her chest, she said Toby noticed and got involved.

“The next think I know, Toby’s up on his hind feet and he’s got his front paws on my shoulders,” she recalled. “He pushed me to the ground, and once I was on my back, he began jumping up and down on my chest.”

That’s when the apple dislodged and Toby started licking her face to keep her from passing out, she said.

“I literally have pawprint-shaped bruises on my chest. I’m still a little hoarse, but otherwise, I’m OK,” Parkhurst said.

“The doctor said I probably wouldnt be here without Toby,” said Parkhurst, a jewelry artist. “I keep looking at him and saying ‘Youre amazing.’”